Here you are, sitting in a chair, having an interview for a job you would really like. There is this person, asking you to tell them a little bit about your core values… and you have no idea what to answer to it. Have you heard of the term ‘Core Values’ before? What did you do with it? Do you know what some of YOUR core values are?
Core values are actually pretty easy to figure out, and also help you figure out another important part of you. Let me ask you this… What is it that really, truly matters most to you? What are some things that are very important to you? Is it faith? Maybe it is trust? Could it be honesty? Or loyalty? Perhaps integrity, or respect? What about dependability? How do you feel about commitment and consistency? Maybe all of the above?
The Purpose of Core Values…
There are so many different core values people have, and it is completely okay to have all of them, but make sure it’s realistic. As a matter of fact, core values can be a great guidance to help you set healthy boundaries in your life. When having core values, you don’t settle for less than what you value, and helps you finding things throughout life that matter to you. Many people use core values as a roadmap in life to get to where they would like to get to in life, and without them they would run around in a hamster wheel.
Do you recall a time in your past where you sat down with someone telling them, or trying to explain to them some of your fundamental beliefs you have? And if not, let’s do it now… What are some of your fundamental beliefs you have? Core values are a guidance that help you understand right from wrong. A lot of people were surrounded by people that weren’t very responsible, and were not taught what right from wrong is, and yet were held responsible when they got in trouble. That is not okay… how is someone supposed to do right when they don’t know what right is? But the great thing is, core values can be recognized at any age.
Core Values All Around You
The way a person treats others, or acts is influenced by their core values or character traits as other people call them. Have you ever listened to a conversation when someone was saying: “Oh, he is so adventurous, and dependable. He is very courageous…”. These are a person’s character traits. Or when a friend of yours tells you about her new boyfriend saying things like: “He is completely committed, and consistent. Oh my gosh, he is so friendly, and humorous. I really like him…”. She likes him for his core values, his character traits… the things that make him, him.
Think back about a time when you found a new friend, when you started getting closer to that person, and started recognizing things you liked in that person. Sometimes we don’t even realize what it is, and don’t think about… but when you give it a thought, you start recognizing traits that you value. They matter to you. They are important to you… that’s why you like being around them. Watch how a person behaves, that gives away a lot of that person’s core values… then pay attention to how you behave, and you’ll start recognizing a lot of your values.
The History of Yours…
As you start recognizing your values, you can start seeing where they have come from. Let’s say you can’t stand someone being late to a meeting or a date… could it be that it came from your parents teaching you how disrespectful it is to be late, and wasting someone else’s time is? Some of our values were instilled inside us from our influences throughout life so far.
What is something you like to do that brings you joy when you do it? Tell me something you want to achieve? What’s something you experience that gives your life meaning? What is something you would like to experience that maybe you haven’t yet? Once you start recognizing some of your core values, make sure you make them mean something. For example, if being on time is one of your important core values, don’t just let the person slide by if they are late saying that it’s okay. Because it’s not to you, so say it. What good is it for you to have core values if they are just being overlooked or disregarded?
Core values impact the way you respond, act and behave, so it helps knowing what some of the main ones of yours are in order to start understanding yourself.
A Way to Figure out Yours
This week, dig a little deeper into what your values are. Can you think back and remember some things you liked to do as a kid? And what are some things you like doing now? What are some things you no longer do? Can you recall what it was that got you to stop doing it? What are some things that you are most proud of in your life so far? And what is it about that accomplishment that makes you proud of it? Take some time (and it doesn’t have to be done all at once…) to think these things through. Write them down, even with no order at all, where you can take a good look at them.
Having core values helps you living an intentional life. It helps to live a fulfilling life. Have you ever set a goal for yourself, and when you reached it and accomplished it, it felt so amazing? When you honor your own set personal values, it feels just like that, this amazing, satisfying feeling. You are valuing yourself, and it feels amazing. You no longer live off others’ personal values.
Do you remember on the very first blog where we talked about us waking up not even knowing why we are waking up, and feeling empty? It was because partially we lived a life off someone else’s values, we lived a life that someone else told us to live by, and that wasn’t fulfilling. Don’t just go by what other people tell you to do, and live by what they say you need to live by. Once you recognize your values, what’s important to you, and what matters to you, it will help in so many ways. You’ll recognize that making decisions is so much easier. You will start recognizing where it is good for you to invest your time, and your energy into, where it’s satisfying for you. It will start bringing satisfaction. So put some thought into it… You owe it to yourself.
I can’t wait to hear what you’ll discover through this process 😊. Give yourself lots of room, and there is no right and wrong! This truly is a process to start recognizing yourself… The one and only, unique, valuable person you have been created to be! And we’ll see what comes next in a week.
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