Do you recall the moment of low self esteem? What if you’ve felt a lot of it throughout your life to this point? Have you been living in low self esteem for a while? Is this the moment in life where you’ve had enough of it, and are trying to break free from, switching from low to healthy self esteem? The moment you are trying to transform those low self esteem thoughts into confidence? Can you recognize the roots, and beginning of when you first started thinking of yourself much lower than you actually are? Let’s work on that this week. Sound good?
Self Esteem vs. LOW Self Esteem
I’m sure you’ve heard the term ‘self-esteem’ before. But what is it actually? When we are talking about self esteem, we are talking about an overall opinion a person has of themselves. So a good, or healthy rather, self esteem is when a person sees themselves as deserving respect (not in a cocky way though). It’s the healthy kind when you feel good about yourself. So when is it low then? The low self esteem is when there is a lack of confidence in a person. There really isn’t much confidence in what they can do, what they bring to the table, or who they actually are.
When you deal with low self esteem, you don’t feel loved often. Sometimes you feel like you are not enough. And you might feel un-important and inadequate. You tend to be scared to make mistakes, or to let others down… as a result you try to hide, you try to use the imposter syndrome, or you start people pleasing. You tend to forget who you are and your value.
To Recognize Low Self Esteem
One way to recognize whether you have low self esteem is this, and it’s so important that you are honest with yourself about this… Ask yourself: Am I comparing myself in a negative way a lot to others? That’s a common action we take often when we have a low self esteem. Another common action being taken when dealing with low self esteem is when we talk negatively about ourselves. Something else it can be recognized by is by not having boundaries, and people pleasing as mentioned in blogs before. When things go wrong, who is the first person you blame? If the answer is yourself, even when it wasn’t your fault at all, that can be another visible character of low self esteem.
You see, low self esteem can have negative long term results on a person. That’s why it is so important to face it, deal with it, and work on turning it into a positive self esteem as soon as possible. When low self esteem is not being worked on, it can result in high stress, emotional distress, anxiety, panic moments, substance abuse, risky behaviors, and much more. Another result of staying in a low self esteem is unhealthy and toxic relationships.
Please know that every person has had moments of low self esteem before, but there is a difference between having a moment here and there, and having it most of the time as a regular thing.
What are the Roots of Your Low Self Esteem?
So where does low self esteem come from? It can be very tricky, because it might have been something causing it for a long period of time, or it could have been one event switching it from one moment to the other. Here are some things that can cause low self esteem: Maybe it was a job loss, and were having a really hard time finding another job. Perhaps you have been bullied, were made fun of, experienced prejudice, or were discriminated. Another big thing causing low self esteem is abuse. Health issues can be a cause also. Of course relationship issues affects it. And there are so many other influences and causes.
With that said, are you ready to look into ways to start switching the low self esteem to a healthy self esteem? Of course it’ll take time to do so. It is a daily practice, and that’s a good thing 😊. Because keep in mind, it is a process. And processes are not microwave meals. But they benefit you mightily in the long-run… compared to a short-term satisfaction.
The Start of Something New
There are so many things that can be done to start building up the self esteem, and I will only mention a hand full of them to you today. But know, if you don’t like any of these, there are many many more ways to do so. Okay, so one thing you can do is acknowledge the positive. When someone compliments you, soak it all in. Appreciate it. If it helps, even write it down so you can remind yourself of it when negative thoughts creep in.
Next thing that helped me… speak positively to yourself. I also wrote positive things down on my bathroom mirror that I get to see, and speak out loud every morning. Treat yourself as you treat your friends, or someone you truly care for. When you mess up, don’t be hard on yourself. It is completely okay to mess up.
Try your best to not compare yourself to anybody else. Remind yourself that everyone is different, and every human being comes with its own values. Accept yourself just as you are… Because you are amazing as you are 😊!
Other Great ‘More Physical’ Options
Try to find some inspiration every day. I like reading devotionals every morning before getting out of my bed. Throughout the day I come across inspirational quotes I like to write down, and re-read as I go. Find out what it is that works for you. You can always write some down on cards, and bring those to the work place with you, where you can switch them every day, and see them when needed.
Another thing that helped me a lot also was to stay active. Exercise. Start doing something you really enjoy doing again. Get back into dance classes… or whatever it is that you love to do, and do it for yourself. Have some fun. Schedule something once a week that you love to do. Whether it’s an event, or an activity… Something that helps to boost you, and re-find enjoyment in it.
Another important exercise to do practice assertiveness, so when the time comes to put it in action, you’ll be able to do so without a problem. It is really important to be able to be assertive in order to set boundaries, and you deserve to do so. Practice to communicate your wants, your beliefs, your needs, how you feel, and what your opinion is. You have a voice also, and it is absolutely okay for it to be heard.
Actions this Week
Alrighty… let’s talk about this week, shall we? Do you still have the journal we talked about at the very beginning? Are you still using it? Either way, pull it back out because this week we’ll write down a couple of things. First, write down positive qualities of yourself. Don’t feel like you have to sit down with it open until something comes up. Just write thoughts down here and there as they come up. It could be at work when you accomplish something, and it might pop up then like “I have great customer service skills” in your mind. Write it down right then and there before negative thoughts try to over-run it.
Second, resist the fear of trying… do something you wanted to do for a while, but the fear of the challenge held you back so far. Then, celebrate it. Celebrate that you’ve overcame the fear, and tried it.
Also, Recognize and remember your value, and keep in mind that you deserve to feel good about yourself. Believe that you deserve love, valuing your thoughts, the way you feel, your goals and interests, and your opinion.
Blessed in Abundance
Once you get your mind set into a positive self esteem, you have the ability to just shake off negative feedback, and that will help you accomplish great things in life. You will achieve your set goals a lot easier. With the healthy self esteem, you won’t just give up when faced with obstacles and challenges, instead you’ll have the confidence needed to continue pushing on until you find the solution needed. And let me finish by saying this… When building a healthy self esteem, it will have a huge impact on how you will allow others to treat you, and it will be for the good 😊. Stay motivated!